Category: Restaurants

Soap Box: 10 Things Servers Shouldn’t Do

The internet is replete with articles about rude customers and how people should be considerate to servers. And let’s be fair, serving is a hard job. I won’t dispute that.  There is absolutely no excuse whatsoever to treat a server poorly.  If you think you’re better than them, the hard truth is probably the opposite.  But these articles make it sound like the customer is the only one ever unreasonable. Not so. Servers themselves do things that are unnecessary, if not outright rude, and equal time is called for. Here are some of the primary things, in no particular order, that servers need to stop doing…

1. Don’t scowl when I order ice water for my drink. Yes, it probably cuts into your tip, but either the customer wants to be healthy, or they don’t want to pay over-inflated drink prices. $3 for a soft drink is unreasonable, outrageous really. That’s $6 for two people. If that’s the issue you need to take it up with your employer, not the customer.

2. Don’t make it an issue if the customer doesn’t want to sit at the table you want them to sit. As long as the customer is not requesting a room or large section that is obviously closed and segregated from all other activity, the customer should be accommodated and made comfortable. It is not the customer’s concern whether they are upsetting the carefully planned rotation.

3. Don’t beg. If I pay in cash, do NOT ask me if I want my change. Ok, you’re busy, I get it, but it’s still my money. Asking this is equal to begging, to panhandling. It’s undignified. There are times that I will, of my own choice, say “Keep the change.”, but that’s my choice and I do so freely. If you are quick on the draw and ask if I want my change I will automatically say “Yes” just as a matter of principle and just to make you make that extra trip… even if I intend to leave it all as a tip anyway.

4. Don’t try to force me into leaving a larger tip than reasonable. The bill is $9.62 and all I have on me is a $20 bill. You bring me change of a $10 bill and 38 cents. (Some will bring two $5 bills.) What am I supposed to do with that? Too many people are too timid to say anything and will leave the larger tip. Unless your service was absolutely fanatbulous… which would be pretty impressive, and rare… I am not leaving a 50% tip. And no way in hell am I leaving a 100% tip. Ever. I now have two choices, basically stiff you, which you will misinterpret as me just being cheap, or make you go back… again… and bring me some ones. Bring me a five, five ones, and 38 cents, the first time and we’ll all be happy.

Side note: I once had a server ask me if I wanted my change when I paid with two $20 bills for a $22 tab. I’m not leaving an $18 tip for a $22 meal. I’m sure they weren’t even paying attention, but it was still insulting. And yes, I made her bring me my change, and I tipped accordingly.

5. Don’t tell me how tired you are, or how you can’t wait to get off work in an hour, or how much you hate your job. Let me be clear on this: I… don’t… care. Not only do I not care, I am now annoyed and put off that you have expressed to me that my presence has inconvenienced you. You are not earning my sympathy, I have a job, too. Oh, and I don’t want to overhear you saying these things to your co-workers, either. Be professional.

6. Don’t stop serving prematurely. In other words, when you believe that my visit is winding down, or you want to hasten my exit for whatever reason, don’t ignore my empty glass. (Doing so will affect your tip.) At least ask if I want a refill. Often I do, but if I don’t I’ll be honest and politely decline. At least then I will know that you were still paying attention and doing your job.

7. Don’t mislead me. If I ask for a Diet Coke, don’t say “Ok” then serve me a Diet Pepsi.  By just saying “Ok” you are allowing me to believe I will be getting a Coke product.  The two are not the same, not to mention that businesses actually do get into legal trouble if caught doing that. Normally I will notice, but even in the times that I don’t, you’re still being dishonest by doing this. It’s called lying-by-omission.

8. Don’t use absurd adjectives. Nothing… and I mean that quite literally… is ever “perfect”. When you ask, “Is everything perfect?”, you are insulting me by asking me to knowingly lie. Granted, it’s usually at the insistence of management, but you don’t have to be so enthusiastic about it. I would even suggest you don’t even have to do it at all. Rather, just ask how my meal is and let me answer for myself.

9. Don’t stand silent if I request a substitution that adds an extra charge. If I want to substitute soup instead of french fries, and there’s an “upcharge”, tell me right then. Allow me the the courtesy to consider my option. Don’t surprise me with a bill later where I’ve been nickle-and-dimed.

10. Don’t be difficult. Don’t tell me a certain substitution is not allowed when other servers have done it for me many times. Worse yet, don’t argue with me when I point it out that it has been done before. The customer isn’t always right, but neither are you. If in doubt, excuse yourself and go check… then be adult enough to admit if you were wrong.

By Annoyances, Restaurants, Soap Box, Tipping3 Comments

Retail: Feeling (Un)Wanted

Go Away!

That’s how it comes off. I’m not wanted. Example: There I am having breakfast with my wife and a friend. Local mom-and-pop place. The waitress, a somewhat elderly lady, comes up and introduces herself and asks how we’re doing. We all say fine, going with the customary pleasantries, then in the spirit of acting interested, I ask how she’s doing.

*sigh* Big mistake.

This was her big opening. For the rest of our visit she made use of the opportunity to tells us that… she was only working because she had bills to pay… listed three things she’d rather be doing at that moment, and how her job was getting in the way of that… complained about how busy it was that morning, she’d prefer less people… and generally made us (me, at least) feel that our presence was unwelcome and an imposition on her life. Now, she did all this in an attempted joking manor, but the humor came off as only a facade, a way to say what she thought and get away with it.

I get it. There are many other things I’d rather do than go to a job for most of every day five days a week. But I make the best of it. So, I’m sorry that our patronage of your employer’s business… that provides you with an income so you can pay bills and have things like food every day and heat in the winter… is such a burden. I’ll keep this in mind next time I decide what to do and where to go.

The whole “I’d rather be anywhere else (than here dealing with you)” image is not an image that businesses or society should put up with. Treat customers with decency. I don’t want to hear that you’re getting off in an hour. I especially don’t want to hear what drudgery your job is.  At least pretend you’re appreciative of my patronage.

The Side Conversation

There is another common practice that I see often that is no less off-putting: Employees having side conversation when they’re supposed to be dealing with you. I see this often, especially with younger people.

I’m standing at a checkout, and the cashier’s friend/co-worker is standing right beside the register and they’re having this deep conversation… and essentially ignoring me completely.

And what were they talking about, you ask? They were talking about getting off soon, what they’d rather be doing at that moment, and… get this… how much they each hated their job and most of their co-workers.

*smh*

No filter, as if I wasn’t even there. Talk about unprofessional. How can a customer not feel unappreciated in that kind of scenario?

My sister told me that she once told a cashier off and that she didn’t give a crap about her personal grievances and wanted to be treated like a customer instead of an annoyance. (She got a shocked blank stare in return.)

I love my sister! I was so proud of her. lol

 

By Annoyances, Restaurants, RetailOne Comment

Tipping: Part 1

…of 193, probably. Ugh! This is going to be quite the series. LOL! I have strong opinions on tipping. Yer shocked, nay, dismayed, I can tell… that I have strong feelings about something.

TIPS: To Insure Prompt Service. Phfft!  Yeah, ok, whatever, I’ve never believed that is the actual origin.

Now, don’t get me wrong. For true service, and good service, I am good with tipping. Many people hear my thoughts on tipping and think I’m a spendthrift and a curmudgeon… wherever would they get that idea???, I mean really!… but I actually tip well. I’m usually in the 20-23% category, sometimes higher, and my wife can back me up on this. I even usually sometimes tip more than they actually deserve when they provide lousy service, I’m still around 15% even for that (though I know I shouldn’t). So what do I kvetch about? Let me tell ya…

1. Entitlement Mentality: This is probably my biggest pet peeve regarding tipping, the entitlement mentality that has developed. It’s no longer an appreciated gift for having done a good job or providing a worthy service, it has evolved to become an expectation and if you don’t live up to their unknown and possibly unreasonable expectation you are treated as a pariah. Scorned and scowled at if you ever go back and they remember you. Simply for not lavishing them with the remnants of your bank account.

The entitlement mentality goes both ways, from some servers and from some businesses. They’re taking advantage of people and getting what is virtually free labor because the state allows them to get away with it.

As things generally go, this entitlement mentality has expanded to other professions that might not deserve a tip. Everyone seems to think they’re special. Which leads us to…

2. Who gets a tip?: Tied to the entitlement mentality, which professions should get a tip? A server in a sit-down restaurant? Sure. They’re running around basically catering to your whims. They are your servant for the moment. Regardless their hourly wage, that’s worth something. Don’t be a tightfisted chump, treat them well. We’ll get into wages in a future installment, but they often are legally paid less than minimum wage (in most states), and that is and should be a factor, but just one factor of many.

How about the person who cuts your hair? Should they get a tip? Yes? Why? I say ‘no’. I do tip, albeit because of the societal guilt trip involved with not tipping, but I shouldn’t have to. I go to independent barbers. They state their price on the wall. End result, they are paid in full, and set their own price based on what they feel their service is worth. That’s fine. But it’s also somewhat dishonest. They know most people will throw in some extra. I say if you want or need more money, then raise your price. I’m still going to pay it, but it will save me the bother of having to wonder if I gave too much or too little. Yeah yeah yeah, you can say that you aren’t forced to tip, no one’s holding a gun to your head, blah blah blah. Societal guilt tripping and peer pressure is powerful, and that’s a fact. A set price would actually be more respectful to both parties.

How about “servers” at buffets and picking up ‘to go’ orders? I say ‘no’. A case could be made for a ‘to go’ order, and it’s true they may get paid less than minimum wage, and there is some effort involved in putting the order together, but it’s far less than table service. As such, a smaller tip would be appropriate, maybe 10%.

Having said that, with a buffet I’m literally serving myself… and isn’t that the point of a buffet… variety and that I serve myself? <shrug> They might get drinks and clean the table afterward (or they might not looking at a local buffet I frequent [they do have good food and they’re cheap]), but that is small compared to literal table service. No, if I’m doing virtually all my own work, the person standing in the corner watching me eat is not deserving of a tip.

The way we’re going, I fully expect bridge toll takers to start getting tips any day now. <insert eye roll here>

Conclusion: So that’s it. That’s the end of Part 1. Future installments will include (in no particular order)… tip jars & counter service, tip sharing, wages & laws, the amount of the tip, the effort put forth, people who don’t tip and/or are rude to the servers, and more. Stay tuned. 🙂

By Pet Peeve, Restaurants, TippingOne Comment

Do you want fries with that?

“Do you want fries with that?”

<blank stare>

“Did I say I wanted fries?  No.”

Do I actually say that?  No.  Not anymore.  Contrary to popular belief, and contrary to standard curmudgeonly customs and expectations, I have gained some sense of couth and social refinement over the years.  Now, I will admit that I want to say that every single time, but I never do.  I mean, that would be rude, right?

Besides, I don’t want anyone spitting in my food.  Practical considerations, ya know.

Yeah yeah yeah, it’s called ‘suggestive selling’, or ‘upselling’, and employees are told to do it because it’s quite effective.  I have read many sources who claim corporations make boatloads of extra money just by adding an extra item here and there.  It boggles my brain cells that so many people fall for it.  Yet, in the interest of full honesty, I cannot claim that I have never fallen for it.  Every now and then, rarely, even though I know what they’re doing, they will suggest something that appeals to my weaknesses and I will succumb.  As a general rule, however, even if it sounds good, and even if I want what they are suggesting, I will politely decline just as a matter of principle.  I have been known to decline even though I was just about to order what they suggested.  I’m kind of stubborn that way.  I’ll show ’em!

Coming into the adult world, I love a good margarita.  Must be frozen/blended.  I call them “Adult Slurpees”, and I am a sucker for a good Slurpee, with or without tequila.  When I order one, though, they usually try to upsell me to a higher grade tequila.  I have been known to respond, “I’m not sophisticated enough to know the difference, so no thank you.”

I always get an annoyed stare in return.  They never laugh.  <shrug>  Plus, after two I wouldn’t be able to tell the difference, anyway, so no, I’m not paying the extra money for a higher-end tequila.

I’m kind of stubborn that way.

By Pet Peeve, RestaurantsLeave a Comment