There Ought to Be a Law… Pt 3*

There ought to be a law…

Truth in advertising should apply to political campaigns, as well.  Well, why not?  Politicians WANT to lie is why not. What I’m talking about is when politicians lie about each other during a campaign.  If Politician A even insinuates that Politician B took bribes Politician B should be able to sue for defamation, or whatever the the appropriate legal area is.

This could also be used as a tool and/or weapon, but a more honest one.  Discovery could be a bitch.  Maybe Politician B chooses not to sue because it’s true.  Eh?  Sounds entertaining, if nothing else.  I cannot think of something more critically important than voters not being subjected to empty and malicious smear campaigns.

Food pictures should be the actual food being advertised.  It’s known advertisers use non-food substances to make their products look better and more appetizing.  Glue makes pizza look stretchy and cheesy.  Motor oil looks like syrup and doesn’t absorb into pancakes.  Motor oil also has been used for beer.  Lard is great for ice cream and mashed potatoes.  Sorry, but no, if you’re presenting a product you need to present the actual product.

“FREE”  You’ve seen and heard it before.  “But 2 get 1 free… just pay separate shipping and handling”“Sign up for our newsletter and we’ll send you a free tote bag(1)”.  “(1)” means pay shipping and whatever.  I’m not even going to provide a definition because any minimally bright person knows what it means in the non-legal non-courtroom real world.  Free should be free should be free.  Period.  All-inclusive, shipping, handling… what the fuck is “handling”, anyway… any kind of tax, whatever.  If you cannot provide it for no cost at all, you should not be allowed to legally make the claim that it is free.

*-Parts 1 and 2 were published under different titles a few years ago.  That, or I just want to confuse you and be random.

Oakla, er… Las Vegas A’s

So, the Oakland A’s are moving. Not official yet, but it’ pretty much a done deal. I’m going to focus more on my emotional feelings and add a bit of historical context so it hopefully makes sense to you.

Arriving in Oakland

I start here because I believe it is an important aspect and the basis for my thoughts. Even though I latched onto the A’s from my first game in the Coliseum in 1972, the intellectual part of my brain says they never should have moved to Oakland to begin with. Charlie Finley, the owner at the time, investigated several potential cities, i.e Dallas/Ft Worth, Seattle, Atlanta (prior to Braves move, Louisville, and several others.  The problem with Oakland was the Giants were right across the bay, and they were very successful. Back in 1968 the American League (AL) and National League (NL) were still two separate and distinct leagues and legal entities. Only the AL got to vote on the move. The NL and the Giants had no opportunity to rally against it.

Dallas/Ft Worth would have been the best long-term bet, but Oakland had a major league level stadium ready to go, so Oakland it was.


I went to uncounted games from 1972 to 2005 when I moved half way across the country. I’ve been to many A’s games in other stadiums since, and I wear the gear and all that stuff. I follow the players, I have my favorites, all that stuff. I am emotionally invested in the team and players.  I figuratively lived and died with their ups and down.

My thoughts on the move

– I’ve said for many years it needs to happen. The A’s have always been the red-headed step-child in northern California, and even though for the first forty years they had much more success on the field, better players, a better stadium, and had a better community outreach program (after Finley sold the team), the area still blindly supported the Giants. Don’t get me wrong, I love the OAKLAND A’s, but lack of respect and the first item noted above, I have long felt they would be better off if they moved. If they established their own fan base, not a shared area.

– That being said, I am NOT enamored with Las Vegas being the new city. The local population is not a wealthy population. A lot of people move there to work in the casinos when young, then move on. They will have to depend on tourists going to random games. They don’t have the time or the money or the inclination to build a devotion to a tea.  TV will show crowds with overwhelming visitor gear, especially when the Yankees and Red Sox visit. That’s not a way to establish a solid fan base.

Ideally, I would prefer they move to Nashville, or even Charlotte, but Nashville has a group pushing for an expansion team, and apparently they have pull, so that’s not happening. Personally, I believe the MLB should tell them to go pound sand. The MLB should be protecting and building they’re existing teams before thinking about expansion.

My bottom line thoughts…

  • They can move and I will remain an A’s fan as my team of choice.
  • They can change the colors, if they want. I’d be annoyed, but whatever.
  • That being said, if they change the name, the team is dead to me. Period.  There’s way too much proud history to be thrown away on a whim.

Las Vegas A’s, or somebody else. Maybe Royals, or Twins, or Tigers. I like all three of those teams, just not as much as the A’s. Even if I go elsewhere it won’t be the same. There won’t be that personal history or memories going back to when I was 8 years old.


This is a difficult issue for me. I’m torn between emotionalism and reality. I’m striving for reality while at least keeping my memories.

Go A’s!  Maybe.


Mornings.  😐  Ugh.  Must we?
*sigh*  I guess so.  That doesn’t mean we should embrace them, and as such I have come to the conclusion that mornings are derived straight from the pit of hell. Evidence that even Perry Mason couldn’t beat…
  1. It’s morning and unnatural to wake up before the crack of 10am. (This one is blindingly obvious.)
  2. Radio station insist on putting the most dumb ass, lame, and inane people on the air.
  3. Fast food restaurants and convenience stores insist on putting eggs on and in everything. Hey!… some non-egg options for us non-egg people would be nice, too.
  4. Those annoying cheery morning people… mentally ill, all of you… will respond to tell me to make my own breakfast.
There’s more, but this is a start.

Please Wait To Be Seated…

You and your sweetie are out for an evening of fine dining.  The work day is over and you want to relax and take it easy and let someone wait on you.  Kick off your shoes without actually kicking off your shoes.  As the Host/Hostess leads you to the table they have selected for you, and it is not to your liking, what do you do?  Do you take whatever is offered and say nothing, or do you speak up and ask for an alternate table?  Is it okay to tell a restaurant hostess you would rather sit somewhere else other than where they want to place you?

This is a semi-important subject to me, and I actually have my own set of “rules”…

  1. The behind-the-scenes “rotation” is none of my concern. As the customer I’m there to enjoy my experience. That’s why I’m paying extra money to eat out rather than stay home. Work it out behind the scenes. That being said…
  2. I will always be polite in my request.
  3. I will always try to state my preference up front right when we walk in, whenever possible.  The exception being as stated in the beginning, when I’m being led to a dissatisfactory table.
  4. I will never… ever… request a room or separate section that is obviously closed.
  5. If the place is super busy I might say something like, “I’d like a booth, if possible.” Emphasis on the “…if possible”. I have preferences but I try to be reasonable, too.
  6. Once I have accepted the seat, it would take a huge extraordinary circumstances for me to request to move. It’s been done, but very rare.
  7. If just the two of us, or with another couple I generally prefer booths. But if I’m in a larger party I hate when they try to stuff us all into a “long booth”. Eff that, that’s extremely uncomfortable, then I want a table.
  8. The only reason I need is I have preferences. I don’t have to justify it beyond that.

So, yes, it is perfectly acceptable to override their seating chart and request something different.

Electric Vehicle Mandates (Probably) Won’t Affect The Grump

California has issued a policy to ban sales of new vehicles with gasoline engines by 2035.  The Grump has mixed feelings about this, but is not automatically opposed.  That being said, this will probably not affect The Grump, and not just because he doesn’t live in California (for good or for bad California sets the standards nationwide and what they do everyone else follows along).  My reasons are less rebellious…

  1. The Grump is cheap.  He values quality and reliable vehicles, but is not willing to keep up with rising new vehicle prices, even without the added current cost of batteries and such.  The Grump has owned two brand new vehicles in his lifetime, the last in 1999, and swore years ago he’d never buy brand new again.  Instead, he has been buying quality used vehicles 1-2 years old where the worst of the depreciation has already occurred.
  2. The infrastructure isn’t there… yet.  This move may hasten infrastructure development, and that would be good, but it’s simply not there right now.  The Grump has no desire to get stranded in eastern Wyoming because there isn’t a charger nearby.
  3. Batteries are freaking expensive!  This is the not-so-secret fatal flaw of the technology right now, and this makes the overall vehicle expensive.  Many people have been shocked at the cost of a battery replacement.  The Grump is not programmed for surprises like that.

Now, would The Grump ever purchase an electric vehicle?  Meh, maybe.  The Grump would be open to it, but honestly all the ancillary factors need to be worked out and make it practical and workable for ME.  The Grump is not willing to ride the cutting edge and work out all the costs and kinks for everyone else.


The Grump was talking with his wife this evening… Grumpette???… and this was our topic:  Internet passwords are a minefield through which there is no rational and effective way to navigate.  Many people like to use the same password for everything, which we all know is not secure, but even if you want to do that no two sites have the same criteria so you can’t do that anyway.  Then there’s two-step authentication, which The Grump grudgingly admits is a good security measure, but it’s a pain in the butt… especially when my phone is in another room and I have to get up to retrieve it.

Now, most sites aren’t too bad, you pick a password and go,  But some are infuriating.  Your “conversation” with the website goes something like this…

  • Website:  Please choose a password.  (And that’s all it says.)
  • You:  abc
  • Website:  Passwords must be between 8 and 16 characters.
  • You:  abcdefgh
  • Website:  Passwords must contain at least one number.
  • You:  abcdefg1
  • Website:  Passwords must contain at least one capital letter.
  • You:  (sigh)  Abcdefg1
  • Website:  Passwords must contain at least one special character.
  • You:  (eye roll) Abcdef1$
  • Website:  No, that that special character.  Chose from the following special characters: @
  • You: (grumble) Abcdef1@
  • Website:  That password is already taken.
  • You:  😐  Abcdef2@
  • Website:  Thank you.  Please proceed.

Ummm… Why didn’t you list your criteria BEFORE I started all this crap?  I mean, really!

Footnote:  I have never used the above passwords, nor even close, nor will I ever.  Go away.

Hmmm… I’m Skeptical

In our daily travels we come across statements from businesses and corporations that, after time, simple aren’t believable anymore.  You see or hear them for so long you know they can’t be legit.  So let’s cut to the chase and list a few…

  1. Many years ago when I lived in Phoenix, Arizona, I would drive by this apartment complex every day.  It was a three-story complex, and on the side near the top, at least 40 feet up, was a permanent “NOW RENTING” sign.  It never moved, never was covered up, never was brought down… always there advertising apartments for rent.  Now maybe they were saying an occupied apartment was an apartment they were “renting”, but that seems a tad deceptive.  Playing fast and loose with the intent of the phrase.  <shrug>
  2. I have been going to my doctor for over 12 years now.  Whenever I call I get the following message, “Please pay attention, as our menu options have recently changed.”  😐  Except they haven’t.  Ever.
  3. A common lunch for me is to order a sandwich and have it delivered to my work.  It cheap and convenient… well, it’s convenient.  The sandwiches aren’t groundbreaking, but they’re fine and I’m lazy, so it all works out.  They’re a national chain and their website says, “We are currently running longer than normal delivery times.“, for every store, every day, at all hours.  It’s a permanent message.  It’s a meaningless message.

The apartment complex wants people to apply even if they’re full.  The doctor’s office wants you to listen because too many people don’t.  And the sandwich shop wants to be able to say, “We warned you it might take longer.” if something goes awry.

Problem is, messages like this do more harm then good.  Not unlike the boy who cried wolf, spread false information enough and no one believes you anymore.

This Is Me!

“Personified.”  In puppet form.  I am both of them, all rolled up into one ultra-sweetie guy.

These two are great examples of how I view and react to life.  You want sarcasm?  I’m you guy.  You want inappropriate reactions to awkward situations?  I’m there to spout an off-color comment.  And of course with a true charming wit.

Here’s some examples of how I might react to a random situation…

Fozzie: Now, tonight, I’m gonna try and put something new in my act.

Statler: Yeah, like comedy, maybe.


Statler: I like that last number.

Waldorf: What did you like about it?

Statler: It was the *last* number!


Statler: Well, how do you like the film?

Waldorf: I’ve seen detergents leave a better film than this.

Then there’s this…

Or, maybe I was talking about this post.  😉

Why Are You Here?, Part Uno

The Grump is a participant of social media groups for social interaction and entertainment.  They can range from serious and political to irreverently humorous to specific topics such as tv shows, etc., and there’s always some schmuck wanting to ruin everyone else’s fun.  You have to ask, “Why are you here?”

For example:  The Grump belongs to a Andy Griffith Show Facebook fan page.  People discuss the show, ask questions, and generally interact, all light-hearted and fun… well, mostly.  Some of the questions are simply “what if” type scenarios.  One “what if” scenario might go like this…

George will ask: “Why didn’t Andy fire Barney for always being incompetent?”

Time-out:  Ok, we all know it wouldn’t have been funny if Andy had fired Barney and everything were totally serious.  We all know it is a farcical situation comedy that relies on the absurd to succeed and entertain viewers.  To continue, time-in…

In pops John:  “Because that’s not the way the show was written.”


Really, John?  That’s your contribution, Caption Obvious?  Pretty sure everyone knows this.  You are not helping or even legitimately contributing to the spirit of the conversation in any meaningful way.

John, dude, why are you even here?  Why did you join a discussion group if you want to discourage discussion?

5 Things I Will Never Understand

We don’t need no pre-amble, let’s just get to it.  The title is self-explanatory.

1. Why my printer cannot scan when it is out of ink/toner. I totally get why it cannot print or make copies, but why can’t it scan?  Why can’t fax?  The conspiracy theorist in me says it’s for no other reason than to force you to get out and buy more ink/toner.  That’s the big money-maker for them, anyway.

2. Typing states in forms.  When filling out a form you literally fill out every line… except the state.  You get a pull-down, instead.  You’re on a roll typing then have to come to a screeching stop and pick an option.  Eh, I guess they figure most people don’t know their state’s two-letter abbreviation.

3. Why there needs to be a “cancel” button on a toaster.  What the deuce?  Back in the day… when I walked to school in the snow uphill both ways… you simply pushed the lever up.  And it worked just fine.  Why wouldn’t that still work?

4. Why “the little people” donate to political campaigns.  After the election you are no longer important to them.  Plus, “neck-and-neck” races end up being 10 point blow-outs, anyway.

5. Why people thank Facebook group administrators for approving their membership in the group.  Is there a skeleton in your closet as to why they might not?

So there ya go.  A handful of life’s mysteries.